LONDON is renowned for having some of the best restaurants in the world and celebrities, perhaps with more money than sense, are trying to muscle in on the hardworking restauraters, but do they know their haute cuisine from their horsemeat?
Luckily YouTuber Callum Leighton Airey, 30, better know as Calfreezy, is on hand to deliver his verdict on the celeb hotspots.
Airey spent his formative years globetrotting in countries such as Russia, Vietnam, Egypt, and Scotland – but luckily he has seen a whole lot more than a deep fried Mars Bar.
Jumping straight into the driving seat Airey headed off for some proper fast food in the shape of Neat Burger, which has restaurants in Soho, Camden and Victoria.
Lewis Hamilton: Neat Burger
Location: Soho
Mains: £7.00 – £10.50
Seven times Formula 1 world champion Hamilton has tried to turn his skill on the track into the burger game and in particular vegan burgers. The fast food concept is backed by both him and Leonardo DiCaprio, but they had to close half of their UK restaurants after financial pressures in 2023.
Can one of their remaining four restaurants deliver the goods?
“The vibe in this place is pretty good. I’m not going to lie. The tunes have got me bopping a bit.” said Calfreezy.
“I got the berry lemonade. Really nice. Not too sweet as well. A lot of time when they do homemade lemonade, it’s really sweet. This is banging. If the lemonade’s anything to go by, this should be pretty good.
“So here we are, the smash burger, the vegan smash burger (£9). Oh, I love that cheese. That’s that filthy American cheese. I’ve gone to take a bite and it’s just slipped out the other side, hold on. Fuck me, this is dreadful. Damn, I’m trying to be nice about it and it’s disgusting.
“Because there’s so much sauce and slime on this, I’ve got to keep shoving it back into the bun. That’s disgusting. Seriously, that’s awful. I don’t know what else to say to you other than that is genuinely like one of the worst burgers I’ve ever had.”
Price: 3/5
Service: 4/5
Food: 2/5
Overall: 6.5/10
(Google review score for comparison: 4.4/5)
Idris Elba: Porte Noir
Location: Kings Cross
Mains: £14.50 – £58.00
Star of The Wire and Luthor, DJ to to the Royals and all round apparent nice guy – is there anything Idris Elba can’t turn his hand to? Well he is now having a good stab at restaurants and in particular wine bars.
Elba even has his own range of rosé Champagne from the brand Porte Noire. His restaurant was slapped with a one star food hygiene report from Camden council though at the tail end of 2023, but we are sure he has cleaned up his act since then.
But what did our man make of it all?
“It is primarily a wine spot, but they do say they have a seasonal menu. It’s a nice vibe in here. I’m enjoying it. Nice smell to it. What a spot. I’ll just go through all the food.”
Calfreezy doesn’t hold back and orders the roasted bone marrow & garlic butter snails (£12.50), sourdough alongside the wild king prawns tempura (£18.50), avocado aioli. It all sounds delightful…
“The bread is nice. I have a feeling that this tempura wasn’t done here. I think it comes like this and they just heat it up. It doesn’t look like a freshly tempura prawn.
“It’s quite clear that this place is definitely based around his champagne and his wine, but if you’re going to serve food, it has got to be decent.
“Do you think Idris Elba has ever been here?
“It’s quite clear this place is made for drinks. So maybe if you’re a wine person, go and try it out, but I think Idris missed on the food. I’m so sorry Idris.”
Price: 1/5
Service: 3/5
Food: 2/5
Overall: 6/10
(Google review score for comparison: 4.6/5)
Ed Sheeran: Bertie Blossoms
Location: Portobello Road
Mains: £15.00 – £19.00
With 14 UK Number Ones and having sold over 150m records worldwide, Ed Sheeran is one of the most popular musicians of our times. But does Sheeran’s obvious recording talent transfer into the cut-throat food business?
“They say the steak here is the best steak in London. A review said that – ‘It was the best cooked steak they’ve eaten’ – I don’t know what uncooked steak they’ve been eating.”
Calfreezy orders a veritable feast of patatas bravas, fried chicken, linguine, and a medium rare sirloin steak (£19).
“Just investigating the patatas [bravas]. They’re really good. I’m really enjoying this. Right, chicken, trying to decide if they’ve just been put in the microwave or not. I don’t think so, though.
“This is a Beef Ragu. The pasta itself is good. The beef is very, like, I’m chomping on that thing, you know?
“I was expecting this to be some really expensive establishment. For two people to eat starters and dinner. It’s actually not too bad.”
Price: 3/5
Service: 3/5
Food: 2.5/5
Overall: 6.5/10
(Google review score for comparison: 4.6/5)
James Blunt: Fox and Pheasant
Location: Chelsea
Mains: £19.50 – £38.00
James Blunt has knocked out over seven albums and sold in excess of 20m records, he is also pretty damn funny on Twitter / X. But just how ‘Beautiful’ is his Chelsea pub?
“This place has actually got an unbelievable interior. It’s very, very nice. Very cosy. This place is kind of like a pub in the front and a restaurant in the back. And it is really tucked away. Cosy vibes,” said Calfreezy.
He order Orzo (fancy pasta), burrata, pickled courgette, tomato & basil sauce, garlic yoghurt (£19.50) and some chips (£5.50) and while he waits the waitress brings a complementary amuse bouche.
“This little free complimentary scran is already infinitely better than anything I’ve eaten at any of the previous restaurants. If you look on a map, we’re actually really close to Stamford Bridge, and I saw a few reviews even say that they were absolutely gobsmacked that this place was charging them £6 for a match day pint. So, to be fair, this sort of environment isn’t the one for a match day pint, in my opinion.
“Not gonna lie, so far, the food, pretty banging. But let me tell you, for the prices they’re charging in here, it had better be banging.
“You can usually tell how good a place is by their chips. And this is a great chip, but more importantly, I have a sweet tooth and they do dessert. This is a serious dessert menu, they’ve got chocolate mousse, a banana split, a raspberry tart, ice cream. This is this is exactly my dream dessert menu.
“What a great little spot the Fox and Pheasant is.“
Price: 3/5
Service: 3/5
Food: 4/5
Overall: 8/10
(Google review score for comparison: 4.7/5)
David Beckham and Guy Ritchie: Walmer Castle
Location: Notting Hill
Mains: £19.50 – £35.00
Actually the pub changed hands and now has new owners. But have the celeb duo left their mark on the Notting Hill pub?
“They have got a pretty impressive menu. Again, this feels really bougie, if I was a tourist and I was coming to the UK, this is exactly the vibe that I’ve got in my head.”
“I must say. I think this is my favourite atmosphere I’ve been to yet. It feels very homely. I’m a big fan. Again though we are in a very posh area of London.”
Calfreezy order the UK pub staple of fish and chips alongside a beef carpaccio.
The beer battered fish & chips, mushy peas, tartare sauce sets him back £21.50 and the fillet of beef carpaccio, truffle mayonnaise, crispy capers, smoked tomatoes, parmesan shavings is £13.50.
The beef carpaccio failed to impress, but the fish and chips was a winner.
“This is gonna be good. I can tell [it’s] fresh. Not too fishy. I will say, a real lack of mushy peas here. Service wise, it’s actually been pretty good. Everyone seems pretty friendly, regular check-ups, making sure we’re all good.
“[It’s a] lovely little gaff. I’m not going to lie. The food didn’t blow me away. Overall a nice experience. The vibes were immaculate.”
Price: 3/5
Service: 4/5
Food: 2/5
Overall: 7.5/10
(Google review score for comparison: 4.4/5)
Salt Bae: Nusr-Et
Location: Knightsbridge
Mains: £30 – £680 (A Lunchtime set menu is available for £39)
Nusret Gökçe, better known as Salt Bae, is the funny internet star famed for his odd ways of preparing and seasoning meat, which became an internet meme way back in January 2017. But how does the Turkish celeb fair in his high-steaks restaurant famed for covering most of his food in gold leaf?
“The first thing I notice is how outrageous the prices are. Who’s going to be the person to get an A5 Wagyu, look at the price of that – you’re going to be looking at 250 quid.
Calfreezy orders two com tacos, asado short rib, avocado, tomato, hot pepper setae with cream cheese (£30) alongside a highly marbled Wagyu tenderloin steak (Starting at £195)
“What’s on your plate? Is it triple digits? Just shy of triple digits. The service [has been] premium. [The] food has been good, but just not worth the outrageous price. But, we still have quite a bit of food to come, so let me just, let me, let me hold fire on that.
“Honestly, if we, if we were doing this as friends and we, we had to split the bill and it was more than £200, I’d be like, that was not worth it. The tacos were fine, the tacos were top tier actually, but it went just rapidly downhill from there.
“I actually thought the service was quite good. It was overwhelming at times . The price, that’s going to be one out of five. The price is actually insane. And especially the fact that they charged me over, almost triple, just for a bit of gold leaf on my Baklava.”
Price: 1/5
Service: 4/5
Food: 5/5
Overall: 5/10
(Google review score for comparison: 3.2/5)
“So to round things up, James Blunt with an absolute masterclass and I’d recommend it to absolutely anyone. Unfortunately, Nusr-Et – I can’t justify those prices.”
You can watch the full video below or visit Calfreezy on YouTube.
Main image Credits: David Beckham | Ed Sheeran | Lewis Hamilton | James blunt | Idris Elba
